Tom's Not Just a Pretty Face

Further to 'A Captains Rant', I must refute all claims that Tom's only contribution to the team is piss poor wicket-keeping.

He collects the kit together after the match, AND he collects the money to pay for the ground and kit etc.

This makes Tom Financial Director and Kit Man. With Tom's influence, the Warriors finances, (pictured above), have never been more exciting or small. In fact, with Tom's help the club is virtually bankrupt, because of some cock and bull about 'only playing home games at the moment'.

Luckily, Jim Stead has shrewdly helped boost the coffers by using adverts on the website. Google are ready to make a payment of 'several dollars'. This amount is thought to be worth over a fiver, and will pay for John Kenny's match fees for the next 32 years. Or Kunz's fees for the next 1.68 millenia